Floating Snowballs Of Doom
by SalamanderLights
Summary: ONESHOT. With a grin and a giggle Hermione shook her head and left the kitchen in a much better mood than she came in. With any luck she'd be coming downstairs on Christmas morning to a pink haired snowman under the kitchen table. HG/SB. Written for the Twin Exchange Fic Exchange!


For: **thegirlwrappedinlightning**

**Pairing:**

Sirius/Hermione

**Prompts:**

Snow

**Quotes:**

"I saw this and thought of you."

Disclaimer – JK owns all.

_'Twas the __night before Christmas__, when all through the house. Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse._

It was the day before Christmas and throughout the entire expanse of Grimmauld Place not one person was speaking, or moving; there was not one person that dared to even shuffle their feet as Hermione stormed through the back door, all covered in snow, and into the busy kitchen.

Apart from Sirius.

It was always Sirius.

"What's got a hold of your tail, kitten?" the raggedy man spoke from the back of the stationary crowd, watching with a grin as the witch slammed the kitchen door behind her only to wince angrily as a series of thuds sounded from the other side of the hardwood. He was pretty such one of her eyes also gave an involuntary twitch.

"You" Hermione hissed, spinning around to face where the voice had come from. "You will pay for this, Mr Black, you will pay."

"What has he done now?" Remus sighed from the kitchen table, taking the dive and breaking the silence of the original occupants of the kitchen just as another dull thud echoed from the door, making the holly above it swing.

"Yes, what have I done?" the man in question smirked.

"You know full well what you have done you old Marauder!" Hermione yelled pointing her finger at him as Mrs Weasley moved toward the door as yet more sounds were heard. "No!" the curly haired witch screamed as Molly pulled the handle in curiosity "don't open it!"

But it was too late.

With a frustrated and fearful yell Hermione lunged at Sirius, pulling him to the floor and on top of her for use as a human shield as an attack of enchanted snowballs flew into the room and straight at her. Or now, at him.

Thud after wet thud was heard and she could even feel the impact of the snow through Sirius until the door slammed shut.

"As much as I do love to watch the mutt get pummelled, I do believe Miss Granger has inadvertently crushed herself under him" the smooth baritone of Severus Snape drifted throughout the room, his black eyes flicking between Sirius's prone form to the red faced girl beneath him whose arms were just not strong enough to push the man off him to take the snowballs for herself; at least she would still be able to breath whilst under siege.

As Harry and Ron pulled a soggy Sirius into an upright position, Hermione sat up right and gasped, "thank you Professor."

A nod was all she got in return.

"How do you know-" Fred started.

"-that Sirius is the mastermind behind that enchanted snow?" George finished, eyeing his twin with a mischievous glint in his eye; they would be working out or finding out that enchantment before the day was done.

"Well we would _all_ know if you two knew the enhancement for _that_" Ginny stated, nodding toward the door.

"-which leaves just Remus and Sirius, the ex-Marauders, as my prime suspects" Hermione continued, now on her feet and glaring daggers and the black haired suspect, or in her opinion, culprit "and since Remus would never harm a fly first, that leaves _him_."

Everyone watched as a wand, not a hand, pointed towards Sirius.

"Hermione" Harry started calmly, putting a hand on her wand arm and directing it's point away from his godfather "can you at least wait until after Christmas to kill my only remaining family?"

"I'm not going to kill him" she growled "or maim him, yet."

"Then what?" Ron asked.

"Since now seems as good a time as any, I went Christmas shopping the other day and came across something very interesting. In fact, Sirius" Hermione smirked, swirling her wand and conjuring the item she had purchased "I saw this and thought of you."

In a flash Hermione had propelled the item toward Sirius, who disappeared behind a cloud of pink smoke as the gift did its work.

As the fog of _WWW hair dye; dye any hair any colour you want! _faded away, a gasp of both acknowledgement, shock and a little bit of pride came from the twins as they recognised their work and saw its victim.

"You're lucky I don't dye all your clothes pink too!" Hermione yelled, eyeing the new and improved pink haired Sirius Black; even his eyebrows sported the new permanent-for-the-foreseeable-future colour. "The dye was going to be a gift for you to use at your own will, but seeing as you can't refrain from making my life hell, even at Christmas, I hope you enjoy your new look!"

A snort echoed from the corner of the room as two pink eyebrows rose in shock; Sirius pulling up his shirt sleeves to see if all his hair was pink.

It was.

As Mrs Weasley dissolved into laughter, Sirius faced her angrily, "kitten" he warned "I was all for the laying on top of you, you've turned into quite the young lady, but turning me pink? You've lost your chance now!"

"_I've_ lost _my_ chance?" the curly haired witch screeched, stopping herself from lunging for him again. "You're the one that enchanted snow to chase me outdoors or in!"

"Treat them mean, keep them keen" Sirius quoted causing silence to fall once more.

"You didn't" she whispered before flicking her wand at the door.

In an instant the kitchen door flung inwards and the floating-snowballs-of-doom entered, but instead of going for Hermione, they headed for Sirius. At double speed.

The man yelled before throwing himself under the table, knocking both Remus and Severus out of his way as he did so, but that didn't stop the frozen water from finding and hitting him, slowly building up a layer of the stuff on and around him.

Hermione chuckled, how could one person be so stupid as to believe that she, brightest witch of her age, wouldn't work out and change the enchantment for anything anyone could throw at her? And to then imply that she wanted him? Ha! She had seen how he looked at her; she could have him anytime she wanted, which was definitely not now.

"Hermione-" Fred said in slight awe before his brother once again finished the sentence.

"-tell us that spell."

With a grin and a giggle Hermione shook her head and left the kitchen in a much better mood than she came in. With any luck she'd be coming downstairs on Christmas morning to a pink haired snowman under the kitchen table.

How very Christmassy.


End file.
